Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
