Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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