I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Boobs speak an international language.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
