i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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