Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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