god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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