Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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