How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize