It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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