No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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