Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
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i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
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We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
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