Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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