Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
