My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
