no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
