Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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