i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
