Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
