I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
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