do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
