just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
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