i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
