Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
