ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You've changed since you got that strap on
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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