I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
