You're completely useless in the revolution.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I have already put on my inside pants.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
