if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
