Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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