This is not my ceiling
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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