is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
