This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
