if i died would you start the facebook group?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
i need some magic done to my vagina
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize