we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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