Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
You smell like stripper and shame
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize