every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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