508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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