I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
