so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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