dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
A+ Viking dick
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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