I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
