omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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