check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I think I won the penis lottery.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
