just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize