youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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