I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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