I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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