my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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