How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Less talking, more tequila
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
