Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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