It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
