so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
